11 May 2010
I've toyed with the idea of NOT writing about this experience in a public setting (blogging) because I know there are MANY of you that worry about my life and surroundings here in South Africa, but I want you guys to have an accurate picture of the great need for people living and acting out a life of Christ's love. Often I'm tempted to paint a picture that I'm great, having the best missions experience, am constantly having fun, and am in South Africa doing great ministry. However, the reality is, I'm not always great, life is hard, it's not always fun, and sometimes I wonder if I'm really making a difference here in South Africa. God always reminds me that I'm at the building-stage of ministry and that He's working on His plan. So, here's a story about real life, real missions, the real South Africa:
Monday afternoon I was wrapping up Teen Club in Capricorn when the door flew open and I saw one of our children (9 years old who attends Kids Club and the Capricorn Church) hair in a mess, with only one shoe on, frantically motioning to get my attention. I went over to her, knelt down and asked her what was going on. She said, "I need to get my sister. My mom and dad are fighting and I need her to come home." The older sister saw what was going on, came over to us and we filled her in on the situation. This precious child had been part of a terrible scene that afternoon- the dad came home drunk/high and was aggressive with the mom. The fight got heated, they were swinging at each other, and the mom shouted for the child to leave and go get her sister. (Apparently, if the kids are home, he's not as violent. I have a hard time believing that, but that's how this particular family copes.) The younger sister answered all my questions- telling me that her dad has used drugs and alcohol for as long as she can remember, but he'd been clean for about a month and began using again this past weekend. She said he got violent about every other day, but this time it was worse than it's been in awhile. To hear this child describe the violence and abuse in her home was heart-breaking. Her little mouth was speaking adult words and her eyes were wide with fright.
I convinced the girls to stay with me at the Living Hope building for a little while- telling them that their parents needed to cool off a minute. They stayed about 5 minutes; I turned my back and the kids were gone. They ran home- obviously worried about their mom. I didn't know what to do, so I just prayed the Lord would lead. I began cleaning up after Teen Club and the older sister appeared out of no where. She was upset and was trying to tell one of the ladies in the community that someone needed to go see about her mom. I went over to her, she told me her mom had taken her sister and fled to a friend's home. She asked me to come check on her mom; the 'safety instinct' in me was cautious, I prayed and decided I needed to go. I walked through Capricorn with the older sister (15 years old- whom I've known since my first visit in 2008). I found the mom in this tiny home, crouched over and sobbing. The 9 year old daughter was right beside her, staring numbly into the air as if trying to escape the disaster all around her. I knelt beside the mom, held her and through tears she began telling me all about the events of the afternoon. About 30 minutes had passed, I asked if I could pray for them, they agreed and I began asking God to intervene, to heal this family, to jump in and rescue them from the effects and disaster of drug and alcohol abuse that's rocking their daily lives. As I was praying, the front door flew open and shouting entered the house. I stopped the prayer and saw the drunken dad coming inside. He had a huge stick in his hand, swung it with passion, hitting the walls and shouting threats to his wife. Much to my surprise, right behind him walked in my friend Shagmie! I was so glad Shagmie came to find us; I felt like God had sent him just for me!
We listened to the dad for about 10 minutes and then I took the girls outside. The mom quickly followed. We went into their home and shut the door. I handed my phone to the mom and told her to call the Police. As she was in the side room telling the Police that she needed help, I felt a sense of panic. I knew the dad was headed this way. The door flung open and there he was- irate and madder than before. He tore wired off the ceiling, unplugged appliances, and continued to threaten the mom. Shagmie and I sat with the mom and dad for awhile… but as everyone know, there's no rationalizing with a drunkard.
Shagmie took the older daughter to the Police station to file a complaint. I was left in the house with the mom and dad (I had the younger daughter go to a friend's house). Things cooled off, we talked, the mom was constantly crying. The dad was just talking non-sense. At one point, I asked him to leave the house to let the mom and I talk. Surprisingly, he did leave and I could see the mom physically relax when he wasn't in the room. Thankfully, the dad never tried anything harsh with me. The Lord was present; I could literally feel His angels watching over!
After about 30 minutes of Shagmie being gone, he and the older daughter walk in and right behind them were about 5 aunties! The oldest daughter called all the mom's family and they marched themselves over to Capricorn (from 2 towns over) to be a protective army! So, we just sat around and waiting for the Police. In that time, I got to know this family REALLY well; we were fast friends, sitting around talking like it was a social event. They even taught me some Afrikaans and I got to practice on them! All the meanwhile, the dad was in and out of the house, ranting and raving, but none of us were paying him any attention. Thinking about it now, it was actually really funny.
Two hours have now passed, 2 complaints (one on the phone and one personally at the Police Station) have been filed and there's no sign of the Police. I hand my phone to Shagmie and ask him to call the Police one more time. About 30 minutes after that call, 3 Policemen show up. Ironically and very typically, the dad calms down at the sight of the Police and changes his story. There were enough witnesses and commotion in that house for the Police to see that something was up. They agreed (hesitantly) to take the dad away for the night to sober up. He would be released the next morning. We were grateful for their help and their action that night, but immediately I was thinking about the threats and pattern this man has in his family. If he acted on his threats, the mom would be dead the next day, the kids would be injured that next night.
Shagmie led a beautiful prayer to end that hectic night. We prayed over the mom and those tender, impressionable girls. As I drove home, I couldn't help but question everything that just happened. It was an out-of-body experience. God was so great to cover us in His protection and let that family rest another night.
I drove home to my spacious cottage with warm blankets and an alarm system. No one was threatening my life and bringing drugs and alcohol's nasty effects into my life. I think about the reality of this situation; this is just ONE of a thousand teens being affected by substance abuse in Capricorn. This one really hit home because it was one of our own. These girls are at EVERY Living Hope and Capricorn Church event. They're true followers of Christ and are leaders amongst their peers. They show NO sign of abuse when they're outside their home; I can only image the teens that act out and cause us trouble in Youth are dealing with the very same things – if not more intense.
Please pray that God continues to guide me and our Capricorn Church leadership to the homes that need us most, that we would open our eyes to the reality of the hurt and pain in every one of our children, teens and adults, that we would meet needs- both physical and spiritual. Pray that God would give me wisdom and guidance in every breath, every step, every day. Pray for my constant obedience to His call.
God is just as present and powerful in Capricorn, South Africa as He is in Birmingham, Alabama.
To really impact lives, you can't stay in your safe-house.
God doesn't call us to safety. He calls us to obedience.
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