Journey of Purpose : Melanie Dill: Youth Girls Etiquette Dinner

Our little community is very diverse, but it can often be isolating. One can feel like Capricorn is the only place on the globe and one will never leave such a community. Well, it's been the goal of our Youth Staff to open the eyes of the socially-blind and help our Youth (specifically girls for now) know how to interact with people, have social etiquette, exude confidence and have true interest in others.

Among the concepts we've tried are small groups - teaching how to speak to people in conversation, ask questions, answer questions, etc. We've taken our youth to other churches - showing that the way they worship or "do church" is not the only way. We're slowly introducing other interactions and lessons, but our latest was a Girls Only Etiquette Dinner. We made a big deal about it. We invited all the girls, told them to dress-up and come ready for lessons on how to eat with a fork and knife. While this sounds funny to most, this was a big deal to our girls ... and our parents were even excited that their children were getting the opportunity to learn "society etiquette!"

One of my friends from Bible College, Adelaide (originally from Ireland), helped me plan and put on the night. We had fun facts about etiquette (thanks for curriculum given to me by my SMBC friends Amy L, Heather G, and Kristen P). The girls read the etiquette rules and practiced them before we began the night ... simple things like 'elbows off the table, say please and thank you, wait until everyone is served the course before you begin eating, etc.' We also had place cards with different Bible verses about counting others better than yourself, be hospitable, use every opportunity to point to Christ; the girls shared their Bible verses and emphasized the need to be selfless in everything. These are hard things to hear from people who do not see selflessness modeled in their families. It's usually "every man for himself" and survival mode in all things.

My friend led the instructions for each course, but first began by letting each girl set her own place-setting. Adelaide taught the girls how to eat soup, butter bread, pass bowls, serve each other, cut meat with a fork and knife, and how to clear the table.

The girls started off nicely. They were dressed up, ready for the night, but they were silent. They later told me they were nervous and afraid they were going to make a mistake. As the night went on, "Capricorn" came out in them and their loud chatter and old table manners slipped out. Meagan noted to the girls as we ended, "Girls, thank you for your participation in the night. We hope you learned something new. However, you girls have a long way to go. We need some more practice." While she made the statement humorously, she wasn't kidding. It was hard for these girls to wait, to serve, to clean up, and to think about others. This was a baby step toward some of the goals we have for our Youth. All in all, the evening was wonderful, educational, and definitely memorable!